Grad School Teen Girl Squad

Okay, I'll bite...

2007-07-15T23:42:00.001-04:00

Did you two go to see Transformers? Either that or my friends have been turned into robots...Either way, I'll accept you both my dear Jazz and Bumblebee.

hahahaahahahahaahah.

2007-06-26T17:16:00.001-04:00

Good Cop, Baby Cop

It makes me laugh when people drop numerous F-bombs

2007-06-26T16:23:00.000-04:00

Wow, it's been over a month since I've posted on this dear ol' blog. And although I commented at the B&G Super Terrific Wedding Extravaganza that perhaps the blog is dying and destined for its final resting place in bloggy heaven, James Franco's potty mouth has rejuvenated the fine art of bloggery for me at least for now. Enjoy.

Here comes the bride and groom!

2007-06-23T13:42:00.000-04:00

Happy Wedding Day Bonnie and Garry!!!

Congratulations and all the best in the future!

Determined to post...

2007-06-20T12:29:00.000-04:00

...even if I have nothing particularly interesting to say! It's been far too long since the blog has been updated---likely due to all of us being uber busy. Anyway, I can't wait to see you lovely ladies and promise a better post to follow shortly.

Bon Voyage Poonam

2007-05-24T00:44:00.000-04:00

Hope you have a wonderful trip!

Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter"

2007-05-18T17:31:00.000-04:00

This is kinda old, but it makes me laugh so much everytime I read it. It makes my world a little brighter. So take a few minutes out to brighten your world. You're welcome.

NEW YORK, BABY!!

2007-05-16T15:40:00.000-04:00

Well, I felt the need to post something new because the creepy old man picture was really starting to creep me out. Since all I can think about these days is the New York trip, I'll post about that. I am not doing nearly as good a job as my friends of coming up with things to do in New York. So far, our list of things to do includes central park, times square, the met, brooklyn bridge, ground zero, shopping, stalking late night talk show hosts etc etc.. (i am too lazy to type out the rest..). All I have been able to add is chinatown, greenwich village, museum of modern art, and nbc studio tour (although i might be the only one who wants to do that last one..). Can you guys think of anything else? What's the first thing you would do in New York? aaaaaaaaand go!

creepalicious

2007-05-14T19:54:00.000-04:00

The library is super creepy 30 mins or so before closing. I didn't realize that the summer hours are in effect and that the library closes at 8, so luckily I got there early enough to do my nerdy biznass, but the place is all deserted except for a couple bizarro people here and there just to up the spooky factor a bit. The fifth floor is especially unsettling. There are all these tarps everywhere as they continue to renovate, and the sound of the tarp slightly rustling is your signal that a creepy old socially awkward man is approaching. Seriously, 30 mins before the library closes is when the creepy old socially awkward men emerge, incoherently mumbling. It's awesome. Now I know the time and place to pick me up some fellas. SCORE!

Creepy Picture for a Saturday Night

2007-05-12T22:17:00.000-04:00

I can't help but think that they have non-culinary intentions for the whisk...

Horrifying and captivating all at once!

2007-05-10T19:39:00.000-04:00

Overheard on the bus

2007-05-10T16:03:00.000-04:00

Girl 1: I just love the captain of the Senators
Girl 2: Oh, I don't really follow politics.

Anyone watch Degrassi?

2007-05-08T09:27:00.000-04:00

I was watching the new episode last night and wondering to myself, why is everyone on this show getting pregnant? If Degrassi is supposed to be reflecting the issues that teens deal with, does that mean there are a lot of pregnancies in high school? I just remember classic Degrassi where everyone was scandalized by Spike's pregnancy...now, at least three characters have become preggo. I think I've become out of touch with teenagers...or Degrassi has...I'm not sure.

Thus ends my random comment for the day.

Random picture of the day

2007-05-01T23:10:00.000-04:00

I guess Fat Bastard from Austin Powers is right - it is the other other white meat.

marking is..

2007-04-29T17:58:00.000-04:00

-craptastico

-soul deadening

-likely to lead to an unhealthy perplexion

-a big waste of my precious time

-dirty

-sometimes funny, like when, for a Children's Literature class, you mark an essay about Peter Pan and The Secret Life of Owen Skye, two books clearly about children, and the student's thesis consists entirely of proving that the main characters are children

-confuzzling and vice versa.. wait.. what?

-an activity that makes me weep and eat lots of cookies

-the bane of my existence.

not a good sign..

2007-04-21T15:55:00.000-04:00

it's like 22 degrees out, and I felt uncomfortably hot wandering around outside this afternoon. What am I going to do when it's actually hot outside?

BC, here I come...?

IT'S BONNIE'S BIRTHDAY!

2007-04-17T11:12:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday to the amazing comp kicker asser,
Bonnie Hughes!!

Blades of Glory: Movie Review

2007-04-16T10:29:00.001-04:00

Does writing "better than expected" count as a review? I can't say that I was super excited about seeing this movie, but it was the end of the term and I was up for a laugh. I don't want to give too much away, since you'll probably go see it-but I think they gave too many of the really funny parts away in the commericals. Thankfully, I hadn't seen one of the commericals in awhile, so the laughs could be new to me again! I don't think I'd want to own it, or necessarily watch it again, but it was still good. I'd give it maybe 6.5 evil wizards out of 10. Let me know what you think when you watch :D

Blades of Glory

2007-04-13T12:39:00.001-04:00

Going to see this lovely movie tonight! Anyone else seen it yet? Review to follow...

And UWO makes the Toronto Star

2007-04-11T09:05:00.000-04:00

Why is it almost never for a good reason? Read here, why Western is in the news again *shakes head* So bad...

Where oh where....

2007-04-10T15:17:00.000-04:00

During one of my refular visits to the Yahoo listserv, I noticed that there was a post about the upcoming Frye conference. The post said that the program was posted on the department website? I haven't been able to find it! Blah. Little help?

STOP CALLING ME!!!!!

2007-04-09T19:04:00.000-04:00

I am serious. I may not know who you are, but you know who you are. So listen up buddy, stop calling me! Every time I see xxx-xxx-xxxx on my call display, I am on the verge of weeping. You have officially broken me. The repeated phone calls from you used to irritate me. It was just mildly irritating to answer calls from you on a daily basis only to have no one on the other end. Sometimes you would mix things up and greet me with static or breathing sounds, but for the most part, nothing. Then you left me alone for almost a month. And now you're back. Why are you back? It's no longer just irritating. I don't even know how to describe it anymore. Do you realize how many other people you bother? In case you weren't sure, you might want to check this out. As of last count, you harassed 28 people over there. Or maybe you want to check this out, where some guy named Dean has figured you are Canadian Bonded Credit. Now you aren't the exact number that bothered poor Dean, but if you peruse the SEVENTY SEVEN comments to his post, you'll see that your number did come up for a lot of others dealing with the same problem. These people believe your are associated with the jerk bothering Dean. You're just one big jerk using a few different phone numbers to maximize harassment of innocent people. When I call you, in order to tell you to screw off, you are apparently not in service. If you are not in service, then stop phoning people!!! In conclusion, I loathe you. Leave me alone.

A much anticipated ANTM post: Farwell to Moe

2007-04-06T15:14:00.000-04:00

Am I alone in watching ANTM this season, or have you lovely ladies been sucked in? This is going to be a rather lack-luster post given that the last episode was not particularly inspiring. I don't feel attached to any of the girls, yet I persist in watching the show. I think my constant joy has been watching Miss J add ruffles every time I girl leave the show. While I support Whitelle in her quest to become the first "plus size" winner, there's something a little off about her pictures. I'd like to see Natasha win just because she's a strange, strange girl---or perhaps Jaslene, the tranny of the season. I laughed to see the visit from Melrose...I think they're running out of potential guest appearances. Next show, Jade?

Happy Easter Weekend!

2007-04-06T15:08:00.000-04:00

way to make a cheesy song creepy and unsettling, alanis!

2007-04-04T17:36:00.000-04:00

I've had this link emailed to me several times in the last few days, so I thought I'd jump on the bandwagon and post it here, in case you've somehow managed not to see this yet:

lack of bloggery

2007-03-30T17:51:00.000-04:00

Hello ladies...

I apologize for my inactivity on the blog---it's been a NUTTY few weeks (updates to follow soon). I'm just headed out the door to a school event, and wanted to say hello and make sure that everyone is doing good. ANTM posts to also follow soon ;)

Marie!!!!!!!!!!

2007-03-30T17:49:00.000-04:00

Do my eyes deceive me? Are you back? I've missed you so! I lost your phone number ages ago...email us all! Hope you're doing great and welcome back home (aka to the squad).

I should win awards..

2007-03-26T16:18:00.000-04:00

..for being so gosh darned lazy. I think I have taken the art of procrastination to new heights. I'm actually somewhat impressed with myself today for somehow managing to do NOTHING OF USE all day. It's not that I am avoiding work by doing other things. I am just doing absolutely nothing. Well I did some laundry earlier. That's about it. Remember when I was talking to you a few hours ago, Bonnie, and I said "well I should go now and read The Robber Bride"...? Ya, still haven't gotten around to that. Too busy being useless. I think I really need to start going to the library so that I can be surrounded by nerds doing work. That might motivate me. It worked yesterday. But the thought of actually going to the library again and staying there rather than running in and out just to grab a book makes me nauseous. Maybe I'll give it another try though.. on a day that isn't today...

those are all the profound words I have for today, kids.

Never complain about your wife's cooking

2007-03-24T18:39:00.000-04:00

Or this might happen to you.

did you know i'm a bollywood superstar?

2007-03-21T19:13:00.000-04:00

i'm going to keep posting today, because marking is gross.

anyway, you should Google me - first and last name. I'm making waves in bollywood.

Three Cheers for Bonnie and Garry!

2007-03-21T15:20:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, I received my very lovely wedding invitation! I excitedly filled it out and mailed it that afternoon. Very classy! I love the postcard-very original. I wanted to write "Jess no eaty the meaty" in the "Allergies" section, but Mark reminded me that others might see my insanity. Super excited to see you all again! June is just around the corner!

i got my passport yesterday.. yay!!!

2007-03-21T12:37:00.000-04:00

but they sent it to Surrey for some reason.. boooo!!!!

and now my parents are having a good time mocking my uber unflattering mugshot-style passport photo.. double boo!

Have a happy.....

2007-03-19T19:08:00.000-04:00

This is a letter written to one of the top executives at Proctor & Gamble.

Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your Always maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core(tm) or Dri-Weave(tm) absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favourite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enou gh to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from "the curse"? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my "time of the month" is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call "an inbred hillbilly with knife skills." Isn't the human body amazing? As Brand Manager in the Feminine-hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers' monthly visits from "Aunt Flo". Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behaviour. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy! The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that Ameri ca is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants... which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: "Have a Happy Period."

Are you f-----g kidding me?

What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness -is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything "happy" about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory. For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like "Put Down the Hammer" or "Vehicular Manslaughter Is Wrong", or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bullshit. And that's a promise I will keep... Always.

Best, Wendi Aarons
Austin, TX

A Nonsensical Ides of March Post

2007-03-15T12:20:00.000-04:00

Say it ain't so!!

2007-03-12T19:50:00.000-04:00

Heroes on hiatus until April 23rd?? NOOOOOO! Whatever will I do?? I might actually have to start doing some work...

and stupid blogger won't let me post a fun Heroes pic. Now this post is lame. Lame like hiatuses.

Insensitive post of the day.

2007-03-11T12:14:00.000-04:00

Yet another reason to always carry a big purse.

I am procrastinating from thesis-related reading..

2007-03-06T13:44:00.000-05:00

..by reading online articles about people who are oh so happy after dropping out of their PhD program.

I am a very well-adjusted grad student.

Adventures at Passport Canada!

2007-03-05T13:02:00.002-05:00

I just got back from spending a delightful morning/early afternoon doing wonderful passport related activities! First I got to meet with a Notary Public bright and freakin' early in the morn so that he could sign some passporty documents. He was extremely jolly. He was all impressed that I'm doing a PhD, but when I tried to explain my thesis, he looked not so impressed and began asking what the relevance of English PhDs really is to the real world. I started to like him less at this point. And then I kind of started to hate him for totally ripping me off and overcharging. So all in all, it was a magical start to the day.

Then I got to Passport Canada, and the line looked insanely daunting. The security guard told me not to run away (as I was starting to do..). He assured me it's not quite as bad as it looks. I guess it really wasn't. I did have to stand in a one hour line up just to get inside the office, and then I had to wait a little over an hour once I got in. A tip to those of you who will be applying for passports in the near future: don't just download the application online, but choose the submit online option. That speeds things up. You still have to wait in the line to get in the office, but once you're in, they take you right away. I felt like a dumbass for not knowing there was that option.

The highlight of my Passport adventure was when I was actually submitting my stuff and paying, there was this total moron getting his stuff done next to me with a different passport official. Ok, so this total angry moron (TAM from now on), starts freaking out at Passport Official Guy (POG from now on) because POG apparently stamped over some important info on one of TAM's documents that will now make travel difficult and TAM travels constantly for business. I wasn't really clear what happened here, but anyway POG at first was mad, but then realized he did make some sort of mistake, so he offered to call some embassy to make sure TAM won't have travel delays. And then this is where it gets good: POG says "anyway, I doubt you'll have problems.. you are white and don't have a turban.. you look like a normal Canadian." What is up with that, POG?!!? Sure, everyone makes little jokes like that here and there, but first of all, POG didn't say that in jest. He was totally sincere. Secondly, POG is a government official working in a passport office.. that just seemed soooo very inappropriate, considering there were many "abnormal" Canadians gathered around within earshot, including myself. I was pretty mad. Fangry, if you will. I just said to the woman helping me, "did he really just say that?" and she said "um, ya, unfortunately, ya...I'm so so sorry.. let's just blame it on his stress.. and I'll let him have it later..". What an f-tard.

Anyway, I'm just happy because apparently my passport will be good to go in 3 weeks even though last week I was told 9 weeks. Huzzah. But I'm realizing right now I incorrectly wrote down one of my reference's contact info. That will probably delay things. Huzzah retracted.

It's back....

2007-03-01T20:21:00.000-05:00

Not sure if anyone else watched, but ANTM returned last night for cycle 8 with a two hour long show! Not sure what to think so far. I remain dedicated to the show, but I must admit it seems very same old, same old. The show promises no surprises, but there is a girl from Russia who married a 40 year old man when she was 18. That has to be promising, right? There are also two "plus-size" models amongst the rest of the toothpicks. We shall see how long they last.

Anyone gonna join me in watching this season?

Vamlumtimes Day!

2007-02-27T19:58:00.000-05:00

Better late than never! Check out the latest Teen Girl Squad cartoon.

London prepares to welcome Poonam!

2007-02-23T19:43:00.000-05:00

the random musings of a procrastinator

2007-02-20T19:01:00.000-05:00

I am so so lazy. I accomplish very little in a day. My whole day is structured around the avoidance of productivity and usefulness. I don't know why I still have a pile of unmarked essays taunting me. It's been weeks. Weeks. Why haven't I given them back yet? Why?

This afternoon, whilst running pointless errands, crazy stalker followed me for a bit so that he could catch up to me to say "hi".. I didn't hear his initial "hi" because I was listening to my iPod, so he felt the need to follow me. That reminded me of that old episode of Friends (I guess all episodes of that show are old now..) when Chandler first realizes he's all lovey dovey for Joey's girlfriend Kathy and so when Chandler sees Kathy out jogging, he goes through all these obstacles (I remember mustard getting squirted on his shirt and some entanglement in leashes of various dogs) just to catch up to Kathy to say "hey" and then walk away like a moron. The only difference is the Chandler/Kathy version was funny and mine was just lame and creepy. Otherwise, it's like I'm living out my own Friends episode.

Speaking of Chandler, I heard that Studio 60 is cancelled. Sunday's episode was apparently the last episode EVER. Is this true?

I thoroughly enjoy hot chocolate.

I really, really hate winter. Or Ontario winters, anyway. I hate snow. I hate slush. I hate wind. I hate you.

Undergrads shouldn't be allowed access to thesauruses.

2007-02-12T17:57:00.000-05:00

That's all I got.

If I have to watch this movie again, I will re-sequence my DNA

2007-02-07T00:45:00.000-05:00

I know the title to this post makes no sense. It's my manipulation of a line that makes no sense from a movie that makes even less sense - The Time Machine. One of the classes I am marking for this term is a sci-fi class, and one of the essay topics involves a comparison of HG Wells' wonderful novel The Time Machine (for which I have a bizarre undying love) and the absolutely ridiculous 2002 movie version, which stars the freakishly ugly, monkey-like Guy Pearce and is directed by HG Wells' great-grandson, the incompetent and retarded Simon Wells.

So I just finished watching this horrific movie in preparation for the marking I have to start at some point, and wowza - as you can tell, I hate this movie. It's soooo bad. Not even in the realm of Ultraviolet bad. It's worse. A whole other level of suckage. I guess if I had not read the novel, I would just think the movie is dumb, but since I've read the novel at least 7 times, the butchering that the original story undergoes in this movie makes me violently ill. Ok, I just wrote my own essay trashing this movie and showing how it totally misses the point of the novel, but that's too nerdy, so I deleted it. Suffice it to say this movie is a pile of crap (although once I stopped being so mad, it ended up being hilarious because it's just so dumb).

I liked what one reviewer had to say about it: "It’s rare to see a movie that takes such a speedy swan dive from 'promising' to 'interesting' to 'familiar' before landing squarely on 'stupid.'" I almost agree with this assessment, but I would change "promising" to "poorly acted", "interesting" to "nauseating", "familiar" to "extremely boring", and "stupid" to "oh dear god, why was this movie ever made!?!!?!?".

Blades of Glory

2007-02-04T15:37:00.000-05:00

more tooth talk!!

2007-01-31T13:07:00.000-05:00

grrrrr. I really really don't like dentists. I just got back from getting a bajillion fillings re-done. First of all, buddy was more interested in watching some profile of a sadistic rapist/serial killer on A&E than on fixing up my teeth. He kept getting his little assistant to turn the volume up. So the whole time I was just paranoid that he's messing things up because he's not concentrating. I'm still waiting for all the freezing to go down, but I do feel like he did something wrong because it feels really weird when I bite down now. And then the other problem - they overcharged me $200. The receptionist wouldn't accept that they were wrong and I'm right. But I couldn't express my point properly because my mouth was still frozen and I suspect I was drooling. I paid the ridiculous amount but told her I'd be back after reviewing the earlier estimate I was mailed from the insurance peeps. I just got off the phone with an insurance peep, and those wily dental bastards did overcharge me. My mouth still looks all gimped from the freezing, but once that wears off, I'm marching back down there and getting my money back!

And obviously, I am never going back to this bodybuilding dental dumbass.

The Relativity of Pain

2007-01-30T18:01:00.000-05:00

Would I rather receive countless paper cuts all over my body and then be rolled in grapefruit juice (or some similarly acidic solution) or mark 69 second-year papers? I pick paper cuts!

Word Up

2007-01-23T18:49:00.000-05:00

Poonam and I attended a thesis defense yesterday, which was very educational and intriguing. We heard some interesting words, as one expects at such an event, such as facile and ecosophy. At the same time, there were an alarming number of words that I never expected to hear at a defense:
- sexy
- sh*!
- bombastic
- diaper
- sanitary napkin
Of course they weren't all used in one sentence (although that would be interesting...), but it was still very strange. Hopefully these words don't emerge at my imaginary defense. Maybe at Poonam's though.

Tooth Talk

2007-01-18T13:37:00.000-05:00

Since my last post was a bit cutesy, I thought I'd veer in the opposite direction for today. I just had a new night guard fitted, which involved having plaster casts of my teeth made. Yesterday the dentist, for some strange reason, gave me the plaster replicas of my teeth. Now I have these interesting objects and I'm trying to think of things to do with them. Besides the boring paperweights/bookcase accesory idea, here's what I've got so far

1) put them under Garry's pillow to scare him when I am mad at him
2) taunt old people for having no teeth while I have two full sets (the same for babies and hockey players)
3) pick a random person and mail the teeth to that person and include a note saying "I know what you did."
4) attach them to a Valentine's Day present with a note saying "I chew-se you!"
5) use them as a model for some type of wedding favour

That's all I've got so far, but let me know if you have any suggestions. I'd love to hear them.

To Cheer Poonam Up After Dentist-Induced Trauma

2007-01-16T00:26:00.000-05:00

The secret ingredient in Great Western, Saskatchewan's best beer (sorry Pilsner):

Attention Peggy fans..

2007-01-15T14:44:00.000-05:00

On Sunday, Jan. 21st (at 8pm), CBC presents Margaret Atwood's The Robber Bride.

i do not heart dentists

2007-01-15T12:53:00.000-05:00

So, I went to the dentist today. And I haven't been to the ol' dentist in a shockingly long time, so I was preparing myself for the hygienist's gasps of horror whilst she scraped and polished my teeth. But she kept complimenting me and saying I must obsessively brush my teeth and floss daily (I don't think I currently own floss...). So I was feeling pretty good. And then my dentist examines my teeth (he's a professional bodybuilder.. isn't that kind of weird..?). Anyhoo, he, too, compliments my teeth and starts saying "oh I can see there will be no problems here.. this is what I like to see..(bla bla yackety schmack more compliments..)". So again, I'm feeling pretty good, and then, right when the exam ends, buddy tells me that although my teeth are all nice and healthy, two fillings I had done several years ago are in need of re-filling and then he lists off a bajillion other potential problems. I was like "whaaaa...? what happened to my supremely awesome beautiful teeth and all the compliments...??" And then he starts saying my remaining wisdom teeth have to come out, and he's getting ready to book all these appointments, so I was like hey back up the dental truck buddy, our u of ottawa insurance isn't the greatest so STOP. I managed to get him to put off the wisdom teeth extraction for a while, but I have to go back and get fillings re-done in a couple weeks. Boooo. Urns. I do not heart dentists. Not even body building ones.

Guess is bringing ugly back...(again)

2007-01-09T21:35:00.000-05:00

Riding home on the bus today I saw something I never hoped to see again: the fanny pack. While I was rolling my eyes at a girl's fake bedazzled ipod (pink, nonetheless), I happened to notice she was wearing a belt over her shirt. Fine, fine...everyone is doing it (or was). To my horror, she turned a little bit and there it was...a Guess fanny pack. Although I have always questioned Guess' idea of fashion (case number 1: the business or formal short), I have continued to admire them in an "hmmm...it's interesting even if I wouldn't wear it" kind of way. I am, by NO means, the foremost authority on fashion, but say it ain't so...the fanny pack cannot be back! Calling the fanny pack a "waist pack" or "hip bag" will NEVER make it more acceptable. If it looks like a fanny pack, sits near your ass, like a fanny pack, then it is a freakin' fanny pack. Say no ladies...just say no.

back in otown.. the city, not the glorious boy band

2007-01-04T22:36:00.000-05:00

i'm back. got back around 9:30pm. i'm tired. my ears hurt. i felt like my ear drums burst and my brain leaked out my ear during the final descent. it was pretty awesome. i'm gonna go to sleep now. bye.

Delight!

2007-01-04T14:02:00.000-05:00

Imagine my great joy as I finished marking the essays from last term and encountered the following pearls of wisdom:
"As more and more women attend Canadian universities to pursue their academic studies, our society will be changed; more women will be delaying marriage and postponing children, gender will become more of an issue since men and women of equal education and equal financial debt willnot always receive equal pay, and more middle-aged Canadians will be caring for their elderly parents as they simultaneously care for their own children. Although education is empowering for women, it will at the same time have a crippling effect on our society."
The author, a young woman, goes on to outline the truly devastating impact this could have, including women deciding not to get married at all (how dare they!) since they will be stubbornly set in their ways, that women will "expect the same salary for the same job," and, my personal favourite, that "a male's ego could suffer if a spouse earns a bigger salary then [sic] himself." I honestly had no idea that my own education could have such a negative impact on men and the larger realm of society. Had I known, I never would have attended university, or I would have at least dropped out once I found a husband, since that's really why women go to university. Now that I've snagged a man, I'm at a cross-road. Do I dare to continue with my own education and risk the utter downfall of the world as we know it? How can I possibly, as a women, even consider causing the slightest bit of damage to a male's ego? Perhaps now that I have received enough education to realize the grave errors I have made, I will be able to avert disaster by dropping out and quickly reproducing in order to maintain the status quo. I would advise all the academic women out there to do the same - the future of Canada depends upon it!!

To switch or not to switch...

2007-01-02T11:49:00.000-05:00

Votes on whether we switch over to the new Blogger? I don't know much about it right now, but I thought I'd see what you lovely ladies thought.

Creepy...

2006-12-27T13:24:00.000-05:00

This really freaks me out...I think it's the dance combined with an oddly placed picture of a random person's head. Let the elfamorphosis begin!

I finally got my Diesels, baby!!!!!!!!!!!

2006-12-26T21:16:00.000-05:00

I love boxing day. I got my Diesel shoes. Still ridiculously expensive, but not horrendously expensive. So yay! I just needed to share that.

Continue enjoying your holidays.

Happy Holidays!!!

2006-12-24T10:37:00.000-05:00

Merry Christmas

Hey ladies,
Hope you're having a fantastic holiday and that Santa brings you everything you've wished for!!!

Yay Poonam!!

2006-12-11T13:22:00.000-05:00

Congrats to Poonam, who successfully completed her comps this morning!

The Story of Comps, With Pictures

2006-12-09T23:15:00.000-05:00

Comps reading begins:

The written exam:

The oral exam:

Success! Peace returns to the village

...until the next episode

congrats, Bonnie!!!!!

2006-12-08T17:22:00.000-05:00

Tom and the rest of us are all very proud of you for kicking your comp's ass!!!

Dear Comps,

2006-12-05T09:56:00.000-05:00

Love Bonnie

P.S. I hate you

Happy Birthday Poonam!!!

2006-12-03T15:52:00.000-05:00

Dear Poonam,

Today is your special birthday day and I know that you really would like to be doing a happy dance.

Instead, I know that you are studying for the horrible c-word, which undoubtedly makes you sad.

Even though it may not be the happiest way to spend your day, I hope that something nice happens for you.

Remember that we will celebrate in a manner worthy of the occasion in just over a week!

Until then, hang in there!

Create a Clerihew Friday!

2006-12-01T11:21:00.000-05:00

clerihew \KLAIR-ih-hyoo\ noun
: a light verse quatrain rhyming aabb and usually dealing with a person named in the initial rhyme

Example sentence: My favorite of Edmund C. Bentley's clerihews is the following: "What I like about Clive / Is that he is no longer alive. / There is a great deal to be said / For being dead."

Did you know? Edmund Clerihew Bentley (1875-1956) was an English writer whose book Biography for Beginners was published in 1906 under the name E. Clerihew. It was a collection of simple, humorous four-line verses about famous people. Bentley had begun writing them as a bored high school student. He didn't call them clerihews himself, but his readers began to do so after the book appeared. How soon after, we can't be sure, because so far we've unearthed nothing earlier than a 1928 description of clerihews as "nice slack metres and sly points." In any case, people have been having fun writing their own clerihews ever since Bentley shared his.

My head hurts so much..

2006-11-27T15:28:00.000-05:00

... that I've pretty much been sleeping nonstop since yesterday afternoon.. score! I did wake up at about 3am to mark a stack of forgotten tests that are due back to my students in a couple hours. That sure was fun. And now I'm gonna squeeze in another nap before I have to TA. The wonderful thing is that my headache has now been joined by a lovely dose of nausea. Yay! I wonder when I will actually get around to finishing off my comps reading lists.. and reviewing.. I should probably do that at some point too..

I absolutely love this picture, by the way. It really sums up how I'm feeling...

I hate you, comps.

2006-11-21T09:33:00.000-05:00

Can't you see this happening to you?

2006-11-19T21:55:00.000-05:00

This has become a favourite commerical here on Wonderland Rd. ;) I often wonder when someone will catch me bustin' a move/ booty torquin' in the bathroom at school...

procrastinating with IMDB!

2006-11-18T16:18:00.000-05:00

This little Jack Black gem looks promising. I eagerly await it.

The Giller Prize and Unknown Authors

2006-11-15T21:09:00.000-05:00

So, the Giller Prize has come and gone this year with what I would consider to be very little excitement (a result perhaps of being away from the literary community). Upon looking at the 2006 shortlist, I was shocked to realize that I didn't recognize anyone. Check it out:

Rawi Hage for his novel De Niro’s Game, published by House of Anansi Press
Vincent Lam for his short story collection, Bloodletting & Miraculous Cures, published by Doubleday Canada (WINNER)
Pascale Quiviger for her novel The Perfect Circle, translation by Sheila Fischman, published by Cormorant Books
Gaétan Soucy for his novel The Immaculate Conception, translation by Lazer Lederhendler, published by House of Anansi Press
Carol Windley for her short story collection, Home Schooling, published by Cormorant Books

Any thoughts? Maybe I'll have to give some of these a go! Until then, David Sedaris' Naked is occupying my time. I don't expect that you lovely ladies will have much time or desire for pleasure reading for awhile! :D

Cartoon Fun

2006-11-13T01:25:00.000-05:00

This Porky Pig clip shows one of the many lessons to be learned from cartoons. His swearing is just so much cuter than mine!

Fergie Alley

2006-11-07T20:44:00.000-05:00

I have always thought that BEP's Fergie looks freakishly similar to Kirstie Alley. They have always been the same person in my mind, so imagine my horror when videos such as My Humps came out, and all I could see was Kirstie Alley gyrating on screen. Blech. Anyhoo, this photo, which nicely illustrates their frightening likeness, makes me laugh.

Where's your grandpa right now? .. In the trunk of our car.

2006-11-05T15:47:00.000-05:00

Well, it took me a while, but I finally watched Little Miss Sunshine. I have nothing really to say about it other than I loved it oh so much and want it to be a part of our blog because of my intense love. Hence the post. Such a wonderful movie. It made me laugh a lot. And the characters were all so endearing. It warmed the cockles of my heart. It's fun when you are enjoying a movie so much, and everyone in the theatre is right there with you, loving every second of it - there were a few moments when everyone was cheering and applauding. I feel like cheering and applauding right now as I think about the movie. *cheers and applauds* Ok, now that I got that out of my system, I will conclude by instructing all people who have not yet seen this movie to go watch it. Now.

Now if he would only oust Tyra..

2006-11-03T18:29:00.000-05:00

Guess who is taking over hosting duties for "cycle 2" of CNTM..

(I think more surprising than this host business is the fact that the show is coming back for a second season..)

Word of the day

2006-11-03T10:22:00.000-05:00

bonnyclabber \BAH-nee-klab-er\ noun

: sour milk that has been thickened or curdled

Example sentence:
When Grandma was a little girl, one of her jobs was to feed the bonnyclabber to the chickens.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARIE!

2006-11-01T10:37:00.000-05:00

Happy Halloween!!!

2006-10-31T15:19:00.000-05:00

Another way to waste time...

2006-10-29T13:18:00.000-05:00

Write out anything you like in the zombie alphabet. Easier to understand than hieroglyphics and tremendously expressive, these wonderful letters can be used to portray one's deepest thoughts.

Very seasonal, don't you think?

i'm bringin' paxil back

2006-10-25T18:59:00.000-04:00

I like you. You have the boldness of a much younger woman.

2006-10-11T21:10:00.000-04:00

Sorry, I watched 30 Rock instead of first half of ANTM, and then I talked on the phone for the last half. I think I need to resign as top model blogger. Sorry.

All I can say about this episode is that Melrose is an ass. That's all I got.

30 Rock was delightful though. I like Alec Baldwin. He makes me laugh.

This makes me laugh

2006-10-05T09:34:00.000-04:00

Okay, for some unknown reason, I find this video, "Little Superstar", way too funny. I think that my brain may be disintegrating or something, but the video just seems to get better and better.

keepin' up with the ANTM hateration..

2006-10-04T21:09:00.000-04:00

I guess the ANTM writers agree with me that this season's models are super boring, which is why this entire episode was full of shout-outs to previous seasons - seasons with more entertaining contestants! First we got Miss Bre, who apparently is a runway expert now (I don't remember her being particularly good at runway during "cycle" 5..), and then the Dennis Quaid show with several previous models (Oh Camille, how I've missed your diva ways), and then the wonderful "thank you for believing in me" Jade montage during judging.

I thought the runway challenge with the wobbly runway in the swimming pool was ridiculous! When would models ever actually be faced with a situation like that?! During that challenge and the walking on cobblestone one before that, I just kept waiting for the sound of a snapped ankle.. yeeeesh..

I liked when Tyra chastized Monique during judging for whining about being sick, and telling her this is "the real world" and no one cares about you being sick. Right, ANTM is the real world.. where the heck have I been living all this time?

My least favourite contestant by far is AJ. Ya that's right - I even prefer Miss "I throw tantrums and fake being sick and rub undies on people's beds" Monique more than than AJ. At least Monique is interesting and doesn't have a dead, vacant look in her eyes at all times, and a chillingly monotone voice. I think AJ is a psychopath, I really do. I would much rather have had AJ go home than Monique, but I loved how, during Monique's goodbye banter, she said the whole experience was a waste and the only reason she's sad to leave is that Melrose will be happy. Oh Monique, you crazy bitch, I'm gonna miss you!

When Miss Jay came out in that runway challenge with Bre and was wearing that bizarro dress, I threw up a bit in my mouth.

Why did the judges start singing during judging? Why? Twiggy looked about as scared and confused as I felt during that debacle.

what can you check off this list?

2006-09-30T22:36:00.000-04:00

In my neverending mission to procrastinate, I come across random crap like this list. I realize it's intended for undergrads, but some of it made me laugh, so I thought I'd post. I have already accomplished a few things on the list - next step:

69. Pick up someone in the library. Fool around on the 6th floor. (I'm there all the time anyway - might as well make it interesting, right? ...i wonder if the number of this item is a coincidence..?)
75. Write an essay in Iambic pentameter.

What I was tempted to do several times in undergrad:

29. Drop a class for no other reason than you hate the people you sit with.
62. Realizing you’ve lost all hope, get drunk before an exam.

What I did do in undergrad at UBC:

51. Tray-boggan behind the cafeteria in the winter.

wedding pics...

2006-09-29T22:51:00.000-04:00

Grad School Teen Girl Squad

Hey All,

So, I've been trying to figure out how to post wedding pics (finally) on this site, and I'm pretty sure I'm about 98% computer illiterate. (I can type without looking at the keyboard most of the time, so that's were the 2% comes from.) Instead, I am sending a link to my friend anj's photosite. She was our photographer and her pics are basically the same I was going to post. It's just about the first three rows before it becomes pics of her husband and baby, but it does the job.

Anyway, enjoy!

Later, Marie

http://www.flickr.com/photos/becoming_mom/page2/

PS So nice to see ANTM posts again!

I am princess of the throne!

2006-09-27T21:46:00.000-04:00

Just thought I'd title this post after one of the many ridiculous lines thrown out in today's episode!

At the risk of angering young Jess, so far the most outspoken supporter of the latest ANTM season, does anyone else find this season to be reminiscent of CNTM? Isn't there something cheap and ghetto about the overall show this time around? I don't know what it is exactly, but every now and then when they show Tyra, I keep getting confused, thinking it should be Tricia. Especially at the end when they showed the final pictures during judging - they were just so bad, so Canadian. haha.

Oh, and the makeovers.. it was so funny when Tyra was unveiling each fancy little artistic rendition of what the contestant's makeover is gonna be. They all kept screaming and oooooh'ing and aaaaah'ing, when very few were anything significant. Oooooh, you are dying a girl's hair brown. Oh no, a breakdown over going blonde. I did very much enjoy the obligatory "no, don't cut off all my hair! not my beautiful, beautiful hair that defines who I am!!!" moment. Although if someone hacked off all my hair, I'd cry too. Which is why I would never go on ANTM. But Jaeda, the one who got her hair hacked off, seemed an odd choice for such a style - Tyra had just said she's "handsome".. shouldn't they be trying to go more the direction of femme and less butch with that one? Just a thought.

And oh my god, poor Anchal! Threading back her freakin' hair line! Who does that?? Tyra normally says crap like "You gotta own your differences and make them beautiful, like how I own my gigantic forehead, unnaturally large boobs, and frighteningly, disproportionately flabby arms and make them mine.. make them beautiful.. make them.. fierce!" But this time - let's unnaturally recede your hairline. Ya, that's what we'll do. Geeez. It was weird that Anchal seemed cool with that. I loved when Anchal got fiesty with the phone whore. That was good TV.

During judging, when Tyra got mad at Jaeda for not "owning" her new look and saying how it's wrong of her not to embrace what Tyra has given her. Right, Tyra, you didn't cut her hair. You didn't even do the drawing of her hair. You are a robot who irritatingly spouts out what she is told by others who are somewhat more intelligent than you. Hush, Tyra.

The final decision was weird. I don't get why they kept the handsome one on. Hmmm.. her name is Jaeda and she looks manly.. previously there was the similarly named Jade and she, too, was mannishly angular.. the return of the trannyliciousness!

i shouldn't be allowed to have..

2006-09-26T02:04:00.000-04:00

..a phone or MSN. I get home from the wonders of TAing just before 9pm and it is now 2am. One would think in that time I would meet my goal of reading the last 30 pages of The Old Man and The Sea. Well, if One thinks that, One is a giant ass. I talked on the phone and chatted on MSN until about 10 mins ago. I still have 27 pages left to go. I, too, am a giant ass.

Check it

2006-09-22T18:08:00.000-04:00

Whew, looks like Poonam's parents had a busy weekend. My parents are much, much tamer.

Tyra and her boobs are back, baby!! (mainly just her boobs)

2006-09-20T22:02:00.000-04:00

Well, first of all, I must make a shameful admission: I was talking on the phone for pretty much the entire show, so I missed a lot of details. Sorry. From what I saw though, these contestants aren't as interesting of a mix as usual. No Jades. No Ginas. I just don't know about this group.

Although of course we know I'm rooting for my Indian sista, Anchal. Actually, I think she's a bit of an F-tard. "Indian people value lighter eyes".. really? do they? And then, oh my god, I could not believe she had no problems doing the naked shoot in the beginning. You better enjoy your time on the show, Anchal, because as soon as you get home, mommy and daddy are deporting you to a remote Indian village to work off the slutty shame you have brought upon your family via tough manual labour on a farm or something. And then at the end of that segment, when she's all like "put me up there again! I'll be naked again!" ... right, you just bought yourself a few more years of wearing head-to-toe covering outfits working on the farm. Way to go.

Tyra's "acting" moment was brilliant. Such a convincing performance as a diva. It seemed like she injected one too many syringes of whatever it is that makes her boobs so massive and went crazy.

Many of the contestants are fugly and manly and were sporting the ol' 5 o'clock shadow. Tyra's attempts during judging to beautify them by manhandling them, messing up their hair, and pulling off their clothing surprisingly didn't improve matters.

Nigel, you are a gay man. Stop pretending you are attracted to your "wife." And you aren't Indian.

I am not even sure who got voted off.. Christian? Was that her name? Did I put up the right photo? Is she the cast-off? I just don't know anything anymore. Much of this episode was just a big awkward blob. Much like Tyra.

me no likey doing workies

2006-09-20T18:23:00.000-04:00

hey kids,
I am really lazy. Someone post a motivational story about how much work they did today. That will make me amp it up. Actually that will just depress me and sink me even deeper into my abyss of lazy. It's taken me several days to read the freakin' adventures of flippin' huck finn. That really should only have taken a few hours. I am so easily distracted. Today I was seriously distracted for a while by a shiny object. I couldn't figure out what it was. Then I realized it's the tab from the zipper of one of my purses. At first I was just really perplexed how it flew off and landed in such a random place. Then I was sad that I couldn't figure out how to get it back on. Ya. That's the excitement going on over here at chez barjellina ballerina. Alright, I can't think of anything else. But I will be back again in a few hours. Why, you ask? Top Model, biaaaatches! The return of my longwinded ANTM posts... giddy up..

mmmm... burgers...

2006-09-19T17:22:00.000-04:00

Evil Bunnies and Evil Jess

2006-09-18T23:09:00.000-04:00

Why oh why has no one ever told me about "Happy Bunny"? Do you guys know about this delightful little harbinger of evil? He's cute, he's charming, he's sooooo bitter! Just type in happy bunny into a search engine and have a gander at all of his sayings. Why is he not our mascot? Him and unicorn must be best-friends...

-"I'll be nicer when you're smarter."
-"I hate everything."
-"You bite big time."
-"Crazy doesn't even begin to cover it."
-"Cute but psycho. Things even out."

Just a sample of the genius that awaits you.

Now on to evil Jess...While I don't have the utter wonderfulness of the bunny, I did get annoyed at ppl today! So, it's raining here and I'm waiting for the bus with my umbrella in hand. Bus comes...ppl crowd instantly, not letting me put down my umbrella to close it. I can't get on the bus with it open, ppl won't move, so what do I do? I closed it while it was wait up in the air! Muhahaha the water went flying everywhere much to the shock of the people around me. Really...you could have just moved...Oh well. It's only water. Next time, move!

Yet another Prison Break rant...

2006-09-18T22:57:00.000-04:00

I can't help but feel frustrated after every single PB episode I watch this season. [FYI: everytime I type PB I get a craving for peanut butter...] Not that I expect thrills and chills every episode, but really...some of this stuff is just so ridiculous. Who knew everyone was headed to Utah, with the exception of Haywire, who has all but completely disappeared from the show, and Sucre (s/p?)??? Doesn't it seem overly obvious? I know someone is going to argue with me---what else are they supposed to do? But really...like T-bag actually would trust the map to Tweener, and like everything was going to work out perfect and they'd find the money and continue on the little adventure. Why did they think the KK ranch wasn't on the map anymore? Cause it doesn't exist???? huh? huh? huh?

On a less complainy note: I do enjoy that the FBI dude's drug problem is becoming more of a central issue, and I'm interested to see where the show will take it. I also like not knowing when characters will die or if they will-adds an element of much needed suspense. With no previews for next week, I am left waiting and wondering.

IMPORTANT NEWS: ANTM BEGINS WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 20th!!!!!!!!!!!!

Websites, Television, an MLIS update and MORE!!!

2006-09-11T21:46:00.000-04:00

I'm feeling like I'm neglecting the blog lately, and I'm not THAT busy with school so here I go with some random and unrelated stuff:

1) I was watching MTV Live the other day and they mentioned this site. Thought you lovely ladies would get a kick out of it.

2) Maybe I have found my calling after all since this made my heart jump with utter JOY! The possibility of cataloguing all of my books has me delighted and trying to find time to do it! Nerdy? yes, but also practical.

3) This is the library blog that I might have mentioned before. It's both informative and entertaining about the MLIS more generally, and Jason puts a much more positive spin on things than I have been doing lately.

4) Anyone watch PB? Upon request (if you missed it! *sniff*) I'll post a summary of the episode. Without giving anything away, I was happy with the episode, yet also disappointed. Things I wanted to happen didn't, and once again, PB was up to its old tricks...trying to be all deceptive and misleading, but I saw through it yet again. *sigh* One day they will foil me! Fool me once...good show...Fool me twice+, WONDERFUL show! You'll get my terrible reference if you saw 2night's show.

5) For all of you who *heart* Survivor, or are mildly interested in the racial organization of the show this year, it premieres Thursday, September 14th.

6) Now for the MLIS update: School goes much better than I anticipated...Classes are okay so far-not thrilling, not necessarily snore worthy-somewhere in the middle. I've met some sane people, thank goodness, and the work for classes seems tolerable. Although, I must admit, I'm still lacking motivation to work. Poonam's recent drive to do comps work has given me renewed motivation, and I end this post with a sincere promise that I will be doing my readings momentarily...while watching Project Runway! I eagerly await our October reunion!

Prison Break: The Good, The Bad, and the Predictable (Spoilers?!?)

2006-09-04T21:03:00.000-04:00

Is anyone else uber disappointed with PB:S2? While I realize that they couldn't sustain the suspense and danger associated with the prison itself, I am horribly disappointed (how many times can I use this word...) that the show has become so predictable or just "unpossible." Where did all of Michael's tats come from (the new ones that seem to appear each show)? Did he always have them, and I never noticed? It's become a recurrent theme of each show. And the FBI agent...how the fack is he so good? He's either one step ahead of the criminals or just seconds behind them. The little teaming ups that are going on lately are just lame and not unexpected, and I dunno, the show just lacks the *zing* it used to have for me. PB:S1 I was on the edge of my seat for the whole hour, barely breathing, jumping up, yelling at the tv. Now, I sit here bemoaning the loss of the certain je ne said quois that made the show so fab to begin with.

I must admit, however, I am pleased to hear that they intend to kill off many characters this season (an announcer mentioned it on a commercial)! As much as I hate to see some people go, the deaths will add a much needed element of the unexpected. Also, the episodes seem to improving slowly. I've enjoyed the one with LJ and the one tonight. The twists seem to be increasing in number too, which is always good to see. I hope I can remember everything that's happened by the time they get to certain plot lines again. There's nothing I would actually call "bad" about the show I suppose...so it's more the predictability that's driving me batty. Maybe I'll retract my earlier "uber"...I'm disappointed, but hoping for the best!

Congratulations Marie and Justin!

2006-09-02T23:14:00.000-04:00

Big congrats to Marie and Justin who made a goregous couple at an absolutely beautiful, classy, and perfect wedding (despite a little rain and chilly weather!). After a promise to Marie not to take pictures during the ceremony, above is the product of a quick photo during the receiving line, but I'm sure Marie will have many fab. pics to show off soon. All the best in the future to the happy couple and *cheers* to many, many, many wonderful and happy years together!!!

Congrats to the Squad's First Successful Comp-it-Upper!!!

2006-08-29T19:51:00.000-04:00

YAY!!! to Poonam for doing uber-fab on her comps! YAY!!!

slow dancing with a pig..

2006-08-27T20:20:00.000-04:00

This is just weird [warning: wee bit of female nudity] and confirms my opinion that performance artists are crazy people who should be locked up in cages... although the freaks would probably let people come stare at them in the cage for a fee so the vicious cycle of ridiculous "art" would just continue. Yeesh.

Shameless Product Placement

2006-08-24T15:16:00.000-04:00

Perhaps to help relieve tension, we should all purchase some Floam. It sticks to anything, makes everything look prettier, and umm, has a cool name. All the five year olds will be hella jealous, which can make anyone's day more enjoyable.

comps inspire in me feelings of..

2006-08-24T10:56:00.000-04:00

New School Year, New Look for the Squad

2006-08-23T00:18:00.000-04:00

Hey all,
I made some changes to our beloved Bloggy! Hope you *heart* them! If you'd like to do anything additional...change stuff around, go for it! I'm lookin' forward to another year of genius, humour, and yes....bitterness! hehe

P.S. Pictures of the new apt. to follow shortly! *waves from L-Town*